So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
