ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
