Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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