I bet he comes in French.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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