well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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