I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize