ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
