Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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