The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
