It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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