ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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