I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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