Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Randomize
