I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
