Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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