Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
