question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
