I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
