did you get engaged???
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
