3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
