3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
