Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
