What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
