East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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