: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Damn victory sex feels great
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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