How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
