You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
