problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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