Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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