All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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