i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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