At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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