But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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