hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Four minutes until I can fart!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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