You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
