Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
