omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
