did you get engaged???
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
