What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
