you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize