just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
