Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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