Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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