I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
