I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
When did angry sex become our thing?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
