You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
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