I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Couch. On fire.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
