just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
