He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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