I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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